Learning, Play & Your Baby

Bonding is the intense attachment that develops between parents and their baby. It makes parents want to shower their baby with love and affection and to protect and care for their little one. Bonding gets parents up in the middle of the night to feed their hungry baby and makes them attentive to the baby’s wide range of cries.

Scientists are still learning a lot about bonding. They know that the strong ties between parents and their child provide the baby’s first model for intimate relationships and foster a sense of security and positive self-esteem. And parents’ responsiveness to an infant’s signals can affect the child’s social and cognitive development.

Why Is Bonding Important?

Bonding is essential for a baby. Studies of newborn monkeys who were given mannequin mothers at birth showed that, even when the mannequins were made of soft material and provided formula to the baby monkeys, the babies were better socialized when they had live mothers to interact with. The baby monkeys with mannequin mothers also were more likely to suffer from despair. Scientists suspect that lack of bonding in human babies can cause similar problems.

Most infants are ready to bond immediately. Parents, on the other hand, may have a mixture of feelings about it. Some parents feel an intense attachment within the first minutes or days after their baby’s birth. For others, it may take a bit longer.

But bonding is a process, not something that takes place within minutes and not something that has to be limited to happening within a certain time period after birth. For many parents, bonding is a byproduct of everyday caregiving. You may not even know it’s happening until you observe your baby’s first smile and suddenly realize that you’re filled with love and joy.

The Ways Babies Bond

When you’re a new parent, it often takes a while to understand your newborn and all the ways you can interact:

• Touch becomes an early language as babies respond to skin-to-skin contact. It’s soothing for both you and your baby while promoting your baby’s healthy growth and development.
• Eye-to-eye contact provides meaningful communication at close range.
• Babies can follow moving objects with their eyes.
• Your baby tries — early on — to imitate your facial expressions and gestures.
• Babies prefer human voices and enjoy vocalizing in their first efforts at communication. Babies often enjoy just listening to your conversations, as well as your descriptions of their activities and environments.

Making an Attachment

Bonding with your baby is probably one of the most pleasurable aspects of infant care. You can begin by cradling your baby and gently rocking or stroking him or her. If you and your partner both hold and touch your infant frequently, your little one will soon come to know the difference between your touches. Both of you can also take the opportunity to be “skin to skin” with your newborn by holding him or her against your own skin when feeding or cradling.

Babies, especially premature babies and those with medical problems, may respond to infant massage. Because babies aren’t as strong as adults, you’ll need to massage your baby very gently. Before trying out infant massage, be sure to educate yourself on proper techniques by checking out the many books, videos, and websites on the subject. You can also contact your local hospital to find out if there are classes in infant massage in your area.

Breastfeeding and bottle-feeding are both natural times for bonding. Infants respond to the smell and touch of their mothers, as well as the responsiveness of the parents to their needs. In an uncomplicated birth, caregivers try to take advantage of the infant’s alert period immediately after birth and encourage feeding and holding of the baby. However, this isn’t always possible and, though ideal, immediate contact isn’t necessary for the future bonding of the child and parent.

Adoptive parents may be concerned about bonding with their baby. Although it might happen sooner for some than others, adopted babies and their parents can bond just as well as biological parents and their children.

Bonding With Daddy

Men these days spend more time with their infants than dads of past generations did. Although dads frequently yearn for closer contact with their babies, bonding frequently occurs on a different timetable, partially because they don’t have the early contact of breastfeeding that many moms have.

But dads should realize, early on, that bonding with their child isn’t a matter of being another mom. In many cases, dads share special activities with their infants. And both parents benefit greatly when they can support and encourage one another.

Early bonding activities include:

• participating together in labor and delivery
• feeding (breast or bottle); sometimes dad forms a special bond with baby when handling a middle-of-the-night feeding and diaper change
• reading or singing to baby
• giving the baby a bath
• mirroring baby’s movements
• mimicking baby’s cooing and other vocalizations — the first efforts at communication
• using a front baby carrier during routine activities
• letting baby feel the different textures of dad’s face

Building a Support System

Of course, it’s easier to bond with your baby if the people around you are supportive and help you develop confidence in your parenting abilities. That’s one reason experts recommend having your baby stay in your room at the hospital. While taking care of a baby is overwhelming at first, you can benefit from the emotional support provided by the staff and start becoming more confident in your abilities as a parent. Although rooming-in often is not possible for parents of premature babies or babies with special needs, the support from the hospital staff can make bonding with the infant easier.

At first, caring for a newborn can take nearly all of your attention and energy — especially for a breastfeeding mom. Bonding will be much easier if you aren’t exhausted by all of the other things going on at home, such as housework, meals, and laundry. It’s helpful if dads or other partners can give an extra boost with these everyday chores, as well as offer plenty of general emotional support.

And it’s OK to ask family members and friends for help in the days — even weeks — after you bring your baby home. But because having others around during such a transitional period can sometimes be uncomfortable, overwhelming, or stressful, you might want to ask people to drop off meals, walk the dog, or run an errand for you.

Factors That May Affect Bonding

Bonding may be delayed for various reasons. Parents-to-be may form a picture of their baby having certain physical and emotional traits. When, at birth or after an adoption, you meet your baby, reality might make you adjust your mental picture. Because a baby’s face is the primary tool of communication, it plays a critical role in bonding and attachment.

Hormones can also significantly affect bonding. While nursing a baby in the first hours of life can help with bonding, it also causes the outpouring of many different hormones in mothers. Sometimes mothers have difficulty bonding with their babies if their hormones are raging or they have postpartum depression. Bonding can also be delayed if a mom’s exhausted and in pain following a prolonged, difficult delivery.

If your baby spends some time in intensive care, you may initially be put off by the amount and complexity of equipment. But bonding with your baby is still important. The hospital staff can help you handle your baby through openings in the isolette (a special nursery bassinet). When your baby is ready, the staff will help you hold him or her. In the meantime, you can spend time watching, touching, and talking with your baby. Soon, your baby will recognize you and respond to your voice and touch.

Nurses will help you learn to bathe and feed your baby. If you’re using breast milk you’ve pumped, the staff, including a lactation consultant,  can help you make the transition to breastfeeding before your baby goes home. Some intensive care units also offer rooming-in before you take your baby home to ease the transition.

Is There a Problem?

If you don’t feel that you’re bonding by the time you take your baby to the first office visit with your child’s doctor, discuss your concerns at that appointment. It may be a sign of postpartum depression. Or bonding can be delayed if your baby has had significant, unexpected health issues. It may just be because you feel exhausted and overwhelmed by your newborn’s arrival.

In any event, the sooner a problem is identified, the better. Health care providers are accustomed to dealing with these issues and can help you be better prepared to form a bond with your child.

Also, it often helps to share your feelings about bonding with other new parents. Ask about parenting classes for parents of newborns.

Bonding is a complex, personal experience that takes time. There’s no magic formula and it can’t be forced. A baby whose basic needs are being met won’t suffer if the bond isn’t strong at first. As you become more comfortable with your baby and your new routine becomes more predictable, both you and your partner will feel more confident about all of the amazing aspects of raising your little one.

All toys you select for your baby should meet safety standards. The tips below can help you find safe toys for your little one. Once the toys are at home, check them often for loose or broken parts.

What to look for:

• Always follow all manufacturers’ age recommendations. Some toys have small parts that can cause choking, so heed all warnings on a toy’s packaging.
• Toys should be large enough — at least 1¼” (3 centimeters) in diameter and 2¼” (6 centimeters) in length — so that they can’t be swallowed or lodged in the windpipe. A small-parts tester, or choke tube, can determine if a toy is too small. These tubes are designed to be about the same diameter as a child’s windpipe. If an object fits inside the tube, then it’s too small for a young child. If you can’t find one of these products, a toilet paper roll can be used for the same purpose.
• Avoid marbles, coins, balls, and games with balls that are 1.75 inches (4.4 centimeters) in diameter or less because they can become lodged in the throat above the windpipe and restrict breathing.
• Battery-operated toys should have battery cases that secure with screws so that kids cannot pry them open. Batteries and battery fluid pose serious risks, including choking, internal bleeding, and chemical burns.
• When checking a toy for safety, make sure it’s unbreakable and strong enough to withstand chewing. Also, make sure it doesn’t have:
  • sharp ends or small parts like eyes, wheels, or buttons that can be pulled loose
  • small ends that can extend into the back of a baby’s mouth
  • strings longer than 7 inches (18 centimeters)
  • parts that could become pinch points for small fingers
• Most riding toys can be used once a child is able to sit up well while unsupported — but check the manufacturer’s recommendations. Riding toys like rocking horses and wagons should come with safety harnesses or straps and be stable and secure enough to prevent tipping.
• Hand-me-down and homemade toys should be carefully evaluated. They may not have undergone testing for safety. Do not give your infant painted toys made before 1978, as they might have paint that contains lead.
• Stuffed animals and other toys that are sold or given away at carnivals and fairs are not required to meet safety standards. Check carnival toys carefully for loose parts and sharp edges before giving them to your infant.

Check to see if a toy has been recalled by the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) by browsing their recall page, here. You also can join a mailing list to receive news about the most up-to-date toy recalls.

SAFETY NOTES:

• Never give balloons or latex gloves to kids younger than 8 years old. A child who is blowing up or chewing on a balloon or gloves can choke by inhaling them. Inflated balloons pose a risk because they can pop without warning and be inhaled.
• Never give your baby vending machine toys, which often contain small parts.
• Keep older siblings’ toys out of the reach of infants.

Your child has gone from tiny newborn to curious infant, reaching out and exploring his or her surroundings. That curiosity and readiness to learn will continue as your baby becomes more mobile during these next few months.

What Is My Child Learning?

Your little one will make great strides in learning. Play will take on a new dimension as language emerges. During these next few months, your baby’s babbling will start to morph into words like “mama,” “dada,” and “baba.” These will emerge randomly at first, but your baby will soon learn to associate them with mom, dad, and bottle.

Your baby will begin to use gestures like pointing and waving for expression. This is also the stage where your infant will understand more of what you are saying, including the word “no!”

As your child gets more mobile and interested in exploring, it’s important to provide supervision and to make sure to childproof the house to prevent accidents.

Babies this age are very busy learning how to move around. They learn to crawl during this stage, though some will develop more novel ways of getting around, such as creeping on their bellies, scooting on their bottoms, or rolling to where they want to go. It doesn’t matter so much how babies get around as long they’re able to move their arms and legs equally and coordinate both sides of the body.

Babies also become better at changing positions, moving readily from lying to sitting, then pulling themselves to stand. Holding on to furniture and other large objects nearby, your infant will take tentative first steps and start cruising along the furniture. Some babies may even learn to walk independently during this stage.

As hand-eye coordination improves, your baby will explore objects in greater detail, also learning their functions: you use a brush on your hair, you talk on the telephone.

Stranger anxiety and separation anxiety also can start now. Your baby may get upset when a stranger approaches or you try to leave, whether you’re going into the next room for a few seconds or leaving your child with a sitter for the evening. Your baby may cry, cling to you, and resist attention from others. This is normal and appropriate for this stage of development, and might intensify in the next few months, then slowly improve as your child develops the language and social skills to cope with a strange situation and feels secure that the separation isn’t permanent.

Encouraging Learning

Your baby’s ability to get around and never-ending curiosity boost learning now, so it’s important to provide chances — and a safe place — for exploration. Your baby may enjoy playing with egg cartons, blocks, balls, stacking toys, and push-pull toys. When your baby is in the bath, provide squeeze toys and cups and containers to splash around with.

Infants are learning to understand language so continue to talk to your baby. Introduce simple words by naming familiar objects and let your baby try to imitate you. Reinforce the words by repeating them. Encourage your infant’s expressions by waiting for a response when you are having a “conversation.”

Continue reading from books with large, colorful illustrations. Point to the pictures and say what’s in them to create associations between the things your child sees and the words that describe them.

Here are some other ideas for encouraging your 8- to 12-month-old to learn and play:

• Encourage crawling during tummy time by helping your baby get into the crawling position on hands and knees. Place a favorite toy out of reach and encourage your baby to move toward it.
• Continue to play games like peekaboo, but vary it a bit by hiding your face with a blanket and letting the baby pull it off, hiding around the corner, and showing your baby how to cover his or her own face with the hands.
• Continue to play hide and seek and test your child’s understanding of object permanence. Let your baby watch you hide a toy — first partially hidden, then covered completely — and let him or her find it.
• Teach your baby action songs, like “Pat-A-Cake,” “This Little Piggy,” “The Itsy Bitsy Spider,” and “Pop Goes the Weasel.” Babies love to hear and learn these songs and anticipate the accompanying movements.

There is a wide range of what is normal for babies, and some babies develop slower and faster than others. Talk with your child’s doctor if you have any concerns.

What Your Toddler Is Learning

Kids transition from babies to toddlers during the second year of life, as tentative first steps give way to confident walking. As your toddler starts exploring, be sure to childproof your home to prevent household accidents.

Language. Kids this age also make major strides in understanding language and figuring out how to communicate. At 12 months, most say their first word and start to use hand gestures and point to things. Gradually, their vocabulary will grow from one or two words to 50 words or more.

Your child will learn about language through interaction with you and other caregivers. During year two, a toddler’s vocabulary increases slowly over the first 6 months and then expands quickly during the second 6 months, when many start to use simple two-word sentences. By the second birthday, you’ll probably lose count of the number of words your toddler can say!

Understanding of language also improves — most toddlers understand much more than they can express.

Playing. Hand-eye coordination and manual dexterity will also improve. Toddlers gain better control over fingers and hands and can explore toys and surroundings more than before. Look for toys that encourage this, as mastering age-appropriate toys and games gives toddlers a sense of satisfaction and encourages them to move on to more challenging tasks.

How kids play also changes. As an infant, your child may have “played” with toys by shaking, banging, or throwing them. Your toddler now is aware of the function of objects, so is more likely to stack blocks, listen or talk into a toy phone, or push a toy car. In addition, the concept of pretend play starts. Your little one may pretend to drink from an empty cup, use a banana as a phone, or imagine a block is a car.

Emotions at Play

Play Dates.  Many parents introduce play dates now. Toddlers enjoy having other kids around, but don’t expect them to “play” cooperatively with each other or to be thrilled about sharing toys. Have plenty of toys for everyone and be prepared to step in when they don’t want to share. Older siblings can be role models when it comes to teaching, sharing, and taking turns.

Emotions. Tantrums are more common during the toddler years, so expect your child to get frustrated from time to time. If you see a tantrum coming on, try to create a distraction with a book or interesting toy. Avoid letting your child get too tired or hungry, particularly while trying to master new tasks, as this can set the stage for tantrums.

While learning to walk during the second year of life, kids start becoming increasingly independent. But expect your toddler to go from wanting freedom to clinging to you for comfort and reassurance, and back again. Allow the freedom to explore but be there when you’re needed.

If it hasn’t come up yet, your child may develop separation anxiety, crying and clinging to you when you try to leave and resisting attention from others.

The start of separation anxiety — and how long it lasts — varies from child to child. It often starts around 9 months of age, but can be later. It improves as kids master the language and social skills to cope with strange situations and start to learn that the separation is not permanent.

Encouraging Your Toddler to Learn

Once toddlers learn to walk, there’s no turning back. Yours will want to keep moving to build on this newfound skill. Provide lots of chances to be active and to learn and explore in safe surroundings.

Games that your child might enjoy include peekaboo, pat-a-cake, and chasing games. Toddlers love to imitate adults and are fascinated with housework. Provide age-appropriate toys that will encourage this, such as a toy vacuum to use while you’re cleaning or pots, pans, and spoons to play with while you’re cooking.

Other toys that toddlers enjoy include:

• brightly colored balls
• blocks, stacking and nesting toys
• fat crayons or markers
• age-appropriate animal or people figures and dolls
• toy cars and trains
• shape sorters, peg boards
• simple puzzles
• push, pull, and riding toys

Reading continues to be important. Your toddler can follow along with a story and point to objects in the pictures as you name them. Encourage your little one to name things he or she recognizes.

Chat about the books you read together and the things you did that day. Ask questions and encourage your toddler to reply by waiting for a response, then expand on those replies.

Remember that some toddlers develop slower or faster than others, and this variation is normal. Talk with your doctor if you have any concerns.

What Your Baby Is Learning

After learning to recognize your voice, your face, and your touch, and to associate them with comfort, your baby will start responding even more to you during these months — and will even give you a smile!

Babies this age spend more time awake and alert and become more curious about their parents and about objects that they see. They also start getting physically stronger and better able to coordinate movements. Encourage the learning process by talking to your little one, responding to his or her vocal expressions, and providing colorful age-appropriate toys.

You’ll now see your baby’s personality emerge. In the first month or two of life, newborns depend on others to initiate interaction. But by the end of the third month your baby will engage you with facial expressions, vocalizations, and gestures.

As their eyesight improves, babies become better able to distinguish between different sights and sounds. Your baby will be carefully watching your facial expressions and listening to your voice, responding to you with coos and gurgles, and around 2 months, respond to your smile with a smile. Between 3 and 4 months, most infants can squeal with delight and laugh out loud.

Babies will learn to open and shut their fists and can hold a rattle placed in their hands. They’ll soon discover that they’re the one that caused the rattle to make noise.

Babies also start to explore their surroundings with their hands, reaching out, swatting at, and grasping for a favorite toy. They’ll also begin to notice their hands and feet, and they’ll become a source of amusement. They enjoy staring at their hands, playing with their fingers, and bringing their hands or a toy to their mouth.

Encouraging Your Baby to Learn

Respond to your baby’s coos and gurgling with sounds of your own so that your baby will be encouraged to keep using his or her voice for expression. In this way, your infant hears the sounds of language and learns about conversation.

Your baby’s sense of touch is also getting better. Provide colorful objects of different textures, shapes, and sizes for your infant to hold and explore. This is a good age to introduce an infant gym with interesting objects that dangle for your baby to swat at. Or hold a toy just out of reach for your baby to reach for, swat, and grab hold of. But don’t string up toys on cribs or other baby equipment — your baby could get tangled in them.

At times your baby will have had enough stimulation. Watch for signs that your little one might be overstimulated and ready for a break.

Other ideas for encouraging your baby to learn and play:

• Gently clap your baby’s hands together or stretch arms (crossed, out wide, or overhead).
• Gently move your baby’s legs as if pedaling a bicycle.
• Use a favorite toy for your baby to focus on and follow, or shake a rattle for your infant to find.
• While awake, let your baby spend some time on his or her tummy to help strengthen the neck and shoulders. Always supervise your infant during “tummy time” and be ready to help if he or she gets tired or frustrated in this position. Never put a baby to sleep on his or her stomach. Infants should sleep on their backs to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
• Make different facial expressions for your baby to imitate.
• Talk to your baby and let your baby respond.

There’s a wide range of normal among babies. If you’re concerned about your little one’s vision or hearing, or your baby doesn’t seem to be developing well in other ways, talk with your doctor.

What Your Baby Is Learning

By 4 months old, your baby has learned to recognize you and familiar caregivers, focus and pay attention to things, and actively engage your attention.

Your infant will learn to sit during this time, and in the next few months will begin exploring by reaching out for objects, grasping and inspecting them.

Continue to foster the learning process by engaging, responding, and encouraging as your child develops a stronger body, a curious mind, and a feel for language. Provide chances for practicing and building on what your little one learns with age-appropriate toys and a safe environment to explore.

Exploring will be a big part of this stage. Your child will be drawn to colors, patterns, and shapes of different objects and toys. By reaching out for things, babies learn about touch, shape, and texture.

Your baby’s ability to reach and hold an object will mature now, and after successfully grasping an object, your tot is likely to put it into his or her mouth for further exploration. It’s important to make sure that any objects that could be choking hazards — or dangerous to your baby in other ways — are out of reach, or even better, out of sight!

Although those first words are still a couple of months away, your infant is learning a lot about language and will begin to distinguish between different sounds, even though he or she doesn’t understand what the words mean. By the end of this period, babies recognize and respond to their own name.

Your baby also will learn how to use his or her voice, and cooing sounds may be mixed with other consonants (such as “ba” and “da”) and evolve into babbling like “bababababa,” “dadadadada,” or “mamamama.” Talk to your infant and respond to the sounds he or she is making — this helps teach the social aspects of language and conversation.

Learning Object Permanence

Your baby also will begin to get a sense of object permanence (knowing that something can exist, even when it’s out of sight). This knowledge will prompt your baby to search for an object that you have partially hidden and to drop toys and other objects over the side of a crib or high chair to watch you retrieve them.

By doing this, babies learn that an object exists even after it’s dropped out of sight and start understanding cause and effect (that an action causes a reaction).

As your baby masters this concept, expect your little one to find more ways to make thing happen!

Encouraging Learning

Create a safe place for exploration (with supervision), because by the end of month 7, your baby will be rolling over, sitting, and reaching for everything. It’s never too soon to childproof the playspace, even if your baby isn’t mobile yet — it will happen before you know it.

Make the space inviting and fun with age-appropriate toys in a variety of shapes, sizes, colors, and textures. Everyday objects, like wooden spoons, plastic containers, and cups also stimulate creativity and curiosity. It’s not so much the toy that’s important, but the way it can help your baby learn.

As your baby babbles and explores how to use his or her voice, keep responding. Reinforce the sounds by repeating them and introduce new sounds and simple words, then watch as your baby tries to imitate you.

Introducing Books

If you haven’t already, introduce books now. When you read to your infant, say the names of the objects, people, and animals as you point to them, and make the sounds of the animals and the objects in the book.

Choose baby books with simple pictures and faces and those with lots of textures to feel, like Pat the Bunny. Also look for cloth, vinyl, and sturdy board books that won’t rip and can withstand a little drooling and chewing.

Other Ideas for Encouraging Learning

• During tummy time, place a favorite toy or soft ball in front of the baby to reach for.
• Hide a toy — but don’t hide it very well — and encourage your baby to find it.
• Play “Peekaboo.”
• Let your baby discover that actions can make things happen. Provide toys that move or make sounds when your baby plays with them, such as baby musical instruments, busy boxes, or see-through toys that show motion.
• Sing nursery rhymes like “Baa, Baa Black Sheep” and “Hey Diddle Diddle.”

Remember that there’s a wide range of what’s normal for babies. If you’re concerned about the way your baby is developing, speak with your doctor.

Jacob loves books. His mom knows this because when she sits down to read to him every night, he waves his arms excitedly.

His favorite page of “Goodnight Moon” shows a cow jumping over the moon. He squeals and reaches for the book every time he sees it. When she is done reading, his mom usually lets him hold the sturdy board book, which he promptly sticks into his mouth.

Jacob is only 6 months old, but he is already well on his way to becoming a reader.

Why Read to My Baby?

You may wonder about the benefits of reading to your baby. An infant won’t understand everything you’re doing or why. But you wouldn’t wait until your child could understand what you were saying before you started speaking to him or her, right? Nor would you bypass lullabies until your baby could carry a tune or wait until he or she could shake a rattle before you offered any toys.

Reading aloud to your baby is a wonderful shared activity you can continue for years to come — and it’s an important form of stimulation.

Reading aloud:

• teaches a baby about communication
• introduces concepts such as numbers, letters, colors, and shapes in a fun way
• builds listening, memory, and vocabulary skills
• gives babies information about the world around them

Believe it or not, by the time babies reach their first birthday they will have learned all the sounds needed to speak their native language. The more stories you read aloud, the more words your child will be exposed to and the better he or she will be able to talk.

Hearing words helps to build a rich network of words in a baby’s brain. Kids whose parents frequently talk/read to them know more words by age 2 than children who have not been read to. And kids who are read to during their early years are more likely to learn to read at the right time.

When you read, your child hears you using many different emotions and expressive sounds, which fosters social and emotional development. Reading also invites your baby to look, point, touch, and answer questions — all of which promote social development and thinking skills. And your baby improves language skills by imitating sounds, recognizing pictures, and learning words.

But perhaps the most important reason to read aloud is that it makes a connection between the things your baby loves the most — your voice and closeness to you — and books. Spending time reading to your baby shows that reading is a skill worth learning. And, if infants and children are read to often with joy, excitement, and closeness, they begin to associate books with happiness — and budding readers are created.

Different Ages, Different Stages

Young babies may not know what the pictures in a book mean, but they can focus on them, especially faces, bright colors, and contrasting patterns. When you read or sing lullabies and nursery rhymes, you can entertain and soothe your infant.

Between 4 and 6 months, your baby may begin to show more interest in books. He or she will grab and hold books, but will mouth, chew, and drop them as well. Choose sturdy vinyl or cloth books with bright colors and repetitive or rhyming text.

Between 6 and 12 months, your child is beginning to understand that pictures represent objects, and most likely will develop preferences for certain pictures, pages, or even entire stories. Your baby will respond while you read, grabbing for the book and making sounds, and by 12 months will turn pages (with some help from you), pat or start to point to objects on a page, and repeat your sounds.

When and How to Read

Here’s a great thing about reading aloud: It doesn’t take special skills or equipment, just you, your baby, and some books. Read aloud for a few minutes at a time, but do it often. Don’t worry about finishing entire books — focus on pages that you and your baby enjoy.

Try to set aside time to read every day — perhaps before naptime and bedtime. In addition to the pleasure that cuddling your baby before bed gives both of you, you’ll also be making life easier by establishing a routine. This will help to calm your baby and set expectations about when it’s time to sleep.

It’s also good to read at other points in the day. Choose times when your baby is dry, fed, and alert. Books also come in handy when you’re stuck waiting, so have some in the diaper bag to fill time sitting at the doctor’s office or standing in line at the grocery store.

Here are some additional reading tips:

• Cuddling while you read helps your baby feel safe, warm, and connected to you.
• Read with expression, pitching your voice higher or lower where it’s appropriate or using different voices for different characters.
• Don’t worry about following the text exactly. Stop once in a while and ask questions or make comments on the pictures or text. (“Where’s the kitty? There he is! What a cute black kitty.”) Your child might not be able to respond yet, but this lays the groundwork for doing so later on.
• Sing nursery rhymes, make funny animal sounds, or bounce your baby on your knee — anything that shows that reading is fun.
• Babies love — and learn from — repetition, so don’t be afraid of reading the same books over and over. When you do so, repeat the same emphasis each time as you would with a familiar song.
• As your baby gets older, encourage him or her to touch the book or hold sturdier vinyl, cloth, or board books. You don’t want to encourage chewing on books, but by putting them in his or her mouth, your baby is learning about them, finding out how books feel and taste — and discovering that they’re not edible!

What to Read

Books for babies should have simple, repetitive text and clear pictures. During the first few months of life, your child just likes to hear your voice, so you can read almost anything, especially books with a sing-song or rhyming text. As your baby gets more interested in looking at things, choose books with simple pictures against solid backgrounds.

Once your baby begins to grab, you can read vinyl or cloth books that have faces, bright colors, and shapes. When your baby begins to respond to what’s inside of books, add board books with pictures of babies or familiar objects like toys. When your child begins to do things like sit up in the bathtub or eat finger foods, find simple stories about daily routines like bedtime or bathtime. When your child starts talking, choose books that invite babies to repeat simple words or phrases.

Books with mirrors and different textures (crinkly, soft, scratchy) are also great for this age group, as are fold-out books that can be propped up, or books with flaps that open for a surprise. Board books make page turning easier for infants and vinyl or cloth books can go everywhere — even the tub. Babies of any age like photo albums with pictures of people they know and love. And every baby should have a collection of nursery rhymes!

One of the best ways you can ensure that your little one grows up to be a reader is to have books around your house. When your baby is old enough to crawl over to a basket of toys and pick one out, make sure some books are included in the mix.

In addition to the books you own, take advantage of those you can borrow from the library. Many libraries have storytime just for babies, too. Don’t forget to pick up a book for yourself while you’re there. Reading for pleasure is another way you can be your baby’s reading role model.

I want to give my 11-month-old son toys that will help his motor skills. Do you have any suggestions?
– Rebecca

Babies this age may be crawling, “cruising,” walking, and grasping things all around them. To encourage exploration and fine motor skills, try giving him toys that have a cause and effect — for example, a toy with buttons that trigger different noises. Stacking rings, simple puzzles, blocks, and rolling balls are all toys he may enjoy, too. To encourage large-muscle movement, try push toys or putting favorite toys just out of reach.

Remember to always check the recommended ages for each toy and inspect them for sharp parts and other potential hazards, such as small pieces a child could choke on.